First Week In Shanghai

Well, after a hectic and frantic month of selling and moving, a month long of saying goodbye and kickin it with my closest friends, I am finally in Shanghai.  The first few days were still very fresh and surreal since Charles was still here. It felt like vacation.  Today has been the first real day where I have seen nobody, talked to nobody and felt completely alone in this huge city of 22 million. Reminded me of my first days living in LA, going to 3rd Street Promenade and walking along the pacific ocean alone thinking "what the hell am I doing here".

China continues to blow my expectations.  New commercial developments on every corner, clean roads (I see workers constantly cleaning the streets) traffic control, no more spitting on the floors, actually lining up for subways.. slowly but surely this city is really trying hard to blow the expectations of all the haters out there. The locals tell me that they are emulating to be as clean as Singapore, which is remarkable, but it is encouraging to see the Shanghainese take such measures to strive for the best.  Signs of spring are already here, the streets are lined with spring flowers, and it makes the streets beautiful.  The bright neon lights that illuminate the city never ceases to amaze me, and I am always in awe. The locals have been so friendly to me so far.  They realize I am a forigener and take the time to help me with things and are much more polite than what I remembered before.

Coming from LA, I feel super "country" sometimes being amazed at living in a city that is the equivilent of NYC and then some.  The city growth is phenomenal however with growth comes growing pains. Pollution is ridiculous, smoking constantly everywhere makes me cough all the time now.  The mix of the super wealthy and the super poor makes you think-- how to the poor live in a city that is pretty much now catering to the rich and elite?

Although I miss being in my daily routine and having my go to friends back home, it is a breath of fresh air here in a city where nobody really knows your past, nobody really knows who you are.  On the flip side, it also is very exhausting to me. The first night E brought us out to the hot new lounge/club in Shanghai. It was super pretentious and filled with attractive and what seemed to be wealthy people. It really discouraged me and made me think- God, please don't tell me this is going to be my scene here because I sure as hell can't handle it. I hope I can find my niche and my scene soon.

When I moved to LA 9 years ago from Arizona, it felt right and I never looked back for a moment. This time around, I am definitely more homesick for LA... and it has only been a week.  The everyday conveniences of driving, being able to store things in my trunk, eating with friends, even Internet access has been challenging.  Not having a phone that works here is also super challenging.  Never in my life have I "dined out" alone, and in the past week I have already eaten 2 meals alone while listening to others have a meal together.

Things will be OK. I just need to give it time.  I miss my friends back home dearly, but I am excited to see what the future brings me.  So much opportunity here in Shanghai and China.  I am beginning to realize how lucky and fortunate I am to have things taken care for me back home, while also having this time to explore and live out my dream.

Excited to see what the next few months will bring for me.  I must keep a positive outlook and I must be open to all new experiences.  Seize the moment and appreciate everything that I have.

30 days and anxiously waiting

Man, today begins the 30 day mark, only 1 month left! I have sold most of my belongings and anxiously hoping someone will finally rent out my dang condo so I can be stress free.  I am really losing hope however with all of the jobs that I have applied to overseas, where nobody has given me even an email letting me know that I am not the right fit.  I guess this is the grim reality of what it will be like to job hunt out there.

The house is so empty.  Every room is pretty much bare minus my room and the downstairs TV room.  Mixed emotions having to pack up your bags and go through all of your belongings and think of all the memories that you have had.  Sigh.

Everyone is also asking me if I will be having a going away party. It just seems like it would be so much work, not to mention saying goodbye over and over to people.. blah. Sounds tiring.  What if I end up coming back in a few months? How embarrassing would that be? I shall see what's going to happen.

Next target date- 3.15 to move out and to hire people clean and wash the carpet.  Home stretch here. I am so anxious and ready to go, but on the other hand, I am not wanting to leave either. Hopefully my feelings will sort out soon.

First Steps

Well ever since I decided to take the plunge and purchase my air ticket, life has been passing by pretty quickly.  Trying to sell your belongings and trying to make sure everything will go smoothly as planned can be quite stressful.  I just can't believe what turned into a thought in my head and a dream is finally coming true.  Will I be able to hack it out there? Will I have the energy and the patience to start all over in a different city and a different country? I'm supposed to have a Skype conference later tonight to discuss some logistics with a job offer, but should I accept and just settle?  Ugh... uncertainty is just driving me insane these days.  Maybe it's because I am getting old, but man I really do enjoy stability.

Deep breaths- everything will be ok. Take one step at a time.  Can't wait for the journey to start.